A Village

1. A village of people it has taken, a very large village of people, to get me to where I am. I have been surrounded by a village of love, care, encouragement, and support my entire life. Over the years my village has just become a chosen village; One that I have formed, at times removing people, and other times adding people. This village has been through a lot with me; moments of glory and moments filled with darkness and pain that was deeper then us.

            Today’s word is sweet. My first thought when I saw the word was to rush to write about something sweet I love to eat but I decided against that for a few reasons. 1.) I am trying to eat healthy and have done well not eating ‘sweet’ things. Writing about it only was going to make me crave it (like I am write now at 11:30pm). 2.) That’s way to expected and exactly what everyone thought I’d write about. And finally 3.) This blog isn’t about food, its about my journey through depression and anxiety, and the experiences I have living in a family that has someone ill. So here I go, a continuation of above about my oh so sweet village.

            This village of people I speak of is a lot bigger then I often have realized in my life. I am surrounded by a few close people who I let in, and share the whole story with. These people have lived large pieces of this journey with me. 3 of these people were the ‘first responders’ on so many occasions. These at the time 3 teenage girls took on so much and instantly dropped things to give me the support I needed. Over the last 5 years their role in supporting me has changed many times but no matter what through these 5 years, they have been on the other end of the phone, talking or texting me. The many things we have been through together could have easily pulled us our separate ways. It was stressful, unpredictable, and at times absolutely miserable but there were also moments that were loving, happy, and joyful. I look at these 3 women and realize what a blessing they have been to me. Often times when I think of their support and encouragement over the years I am overcome with emotion. Overcome by that love they show me and at just how much they believe in me. These women helped me to learn how to believe in myself again. 

            Of course there have been other people along the way. Here at college I have been blessed to meet many people who are encouraging, loving, and supportive but there is one person in particular that has stood by my side at some of the most challenging moments since my initial breakdown. She has at this point lived over half of this journey with me, and when I say lived it with me she has physically lived it for 9 months out of the year with me. There have been many challenges and days that it seems I will never pull out of negativity, but each time whether she realizes it or not she encourages me to keep hope. As with the other 3 women I talked about above this friend of mine has and continues to teach me everyday how to believe in myself again. She pushes me to overcome my fears, get out of my own head and be honest with myself. She calls me out when I give excuses and challenges me to be a better person then I was the day before. While she challenges me she also supports me and helps me to preserver.

            Along with these 4 incredible women have been the most incredible woman I have in my life, my Mom. I can’t even put into words the impact she has had on this journey. She has been through sleepless nights, doctors appointments, phone calls, meetings, intake appointments, you name it, she has been there. She has done what ever it takes to get me the help I need. Along with this amazing Mom I have, I have a father who loves me so much and supports me. Both of them have worked through so many things with me, and through all of it they remained positive with me and optimistic that light would come one day. As usual, they were right, there is hope and optimism for me; they just had to help me find it. 

            These people are some of those 1 in a million people that I have been lucky enough to be blessed with. This is what sweet is, having a village of amazing people to support you, love you, have fun with, and create amazing memories with. I am so blessed and will never be able to put into words how grateful I am for these amazing people but I have done my best to write in one blog post about how truly sweet my life is because of these people and their never ending love. 

   
   

   
   

   
   

   
   

   Till tomorrow, find the sweet in your life!