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          It has taken me nearly a month to process everything that has changed in my life and honestly I still haven't processed it all. Leading up to my graduation from LVC I had been sharing about the many things coming in my life; exciting things that were going to change the person that I am, have been, and will become. I have learned that evolving as a person through life's many shifts, turns, and jolts is really what living is all about; exploring, making mistakes, learning, growing, and finding the core of who you are. Through my time exploring and venturing to figure this life changing perception of life out I have learned to live, love, and grow in ways I never imagined. I have hit many bumps a long the way but the one thing I have found is my happiness depends on no one else but me.
           As I celebrate a beautiful ending to one chapter of life I find myself embarking on new adventures filled with so many good things to come. I strongly remember leaving high school and thinking that the new chapter I was beginning at LVC could be an extremely difficult experience. I was coming out of a rough high school experience and was fearful to immerse myself into the college life that was headed my way. I was scared of the things to come and the difficulties I would face as I continued to work through the baggage that was following me filled with depression and anxiety. However as I leave the LVC chapter and begin the next chapter, which doesn't have a name yet, I look back fondly on my 4 years. When I started I never would have imagined I would end up here with so many beautiful people who love and support me, a degree that has so many possibilities, experiences that will forever fulfill me, and a strength I honestly didn't know I had in me.
            Yesterday as I celebrated my graduation with my family and friends in a new place I found myself overwhelmed, reflective, and overjoyed all at the same time. It was an odd combination of so many things. After most of the people at the celebration left I found myself surrounded with some close friends, their parents, and my parents. As I sat on the couch with 3 of my close friends, one from LVC, one I've known for many years, and one that I haven't talked to since high school, I found myself relaxed and at peace with all of the changes that have come and continue to head my way. I know I will always have those people by my side for the good, bad, and indifferent. Each one of them over the years in their own, very different ways have stepped up to the plate as amazing friends and people at critical times in my life. They have all spent time listening, advising, comforting, having fun and sharing themselves with me. I am so very grateful for each of them and the many times they have been such an important part of my life.
              They once again will be  a staple in the many curves and turns in life take, just in a new and different way then they previously have been. For me having depression and anxiety can also lead to difficulty with change and insecurities with the unknown. I like to know whats coming so I can prepare myself and hopefully lessen the emotional affects major changes may have on my mood. Over the last 5 years I have worked hard to change this and I have become better at rolling with things and dealing with change in a more positive way but at times it is difficult and depression gets the best of me and I feel all alone in those changes. This time however has been different. I don't feel all alone, rather I feel surrounded by a strong support system and an wealth of opportunities that will lead to many new adventures. I have found these changes to be welcome, to be enlightening, and at times extremely healthy for me. While there are still pieces of these changes that are hard and will take some getting use to, I am finding joy in the unknown and excitement in the opportunities that awaits.
            I hope to write again soon but find myself struggling to write on my blog as often from my busy schedule and at times the new ways I have found coping with my depression and anxiety is best. I still hope to share what living with mental illness is like with all of you and be open about my story but it is beginning to take a new shape, a shape I currently haven't figured out. I will share with all of you that new shape in the coming months! Until then thanks for reading and keep checking back for new updates.