Balancing Act

         

           Finding Balance. These two words dictate my feelings, emotions, and physical being on so many levels. I am a person of passion and love for the things that I do, but sometimes it is awful hard to find balance in your life when you have passion and a desire to do everything you can to be successful in what you do. This semester is the ultimate test for me in balance while here at college. Student teaching is amazing and I so far have loved every moment of it, even the paper work. I have had a passion to teach from the time I walked into my first grade classroom and felt the warm loving difference that my first grade teacher made in my life. From first grade on I have always answered the inevitable "what are you going to be when you grow up?" with being an elementary school teacher. Nothing has wavered since that day 15 years ago. But now comes the test of  my ability to find balance and stay healthy. 

          I love what I do each and every day of this semester, I get up and go into school to be greeted by smiling, crying, cranky, and joyous children who at times drive me up a wall. But in the end when I come home every night I have a fire in my belly to go back, to take on the challenging child who tells me they don't want to learn or the child who struggles to keep up with the rest of the class. Each day brings a new adventure, a new experience, and a chance to change the life of a child so they feel that warm welcoming difference that my teacher made in my life 15 years ago. Because of this desire to teach and love the children I see each day I have found it a struggle to balance my work, personal, emotional, and social life on so many levels. Each night I come home and all I do is plan, re-plan, cut, paste, and plan some more. By Friday I have lost my mind and question everything I know about my life therefor sending me into an emotional spiral of doubt and lack of confidence in everything I do. So I have had to find balance through new ways that I never have experience before. I have to schedule everything in my day. I have to schedule when I am going to get that coffee I love, or go practice flute, or go to the gym, or a walk in the park. If I don't schedule it, it doesn't happen.

             Last week I came to the conclusion that I couldn't go on this way for the next 12 weeks, it wasn't going to end well if I did. I had to make an effort to find time for myself and my social life beyond the classroom. I had to close the teachers manuals, turn off the computer, and for the love of all that is good stop looking at Pinterest, teachers pay teachers, and all of the online curriculum portals for a part of my weekend. My host teacher even ventured to tell me on Friday afternoon to close everything, leave my bag with everything in it in my car and not to touch it until Sunday morning. While I didn't follow directions entirely, I did put it away for all of my Saturday and spent time with important people in my life having fun and just being a senior in college. I had a great time and found that today as I walked into school, I was more excited and rested then I have been throughout the first 4 weeks of my student teaching. 

           Balance is the name of the game for me. Balance is what keeps me going, keeps me healthy, and allows me to be the best person and teacher I can be. As I continue my last 4 weeks in my special education placement I look forward to the many exciting lessons, adventures, and untold moments of teaching that head my way. I have learned so much so far and I know I will never stop learning from the students in the classroom. A balanced life creates a balanced person with patience, love, and a whole lot of crazy. 

Cheers to finding balance and a little bit of crazy in your life!