Breathing Hope!

                            I have been on the look out for a few months on ways to make sure that I was spending enough time in my life on self-care and self-reflection time. I have tried many things, promised myself I was going to do dozens of other things and failed at doing them. So I took a deeper look within myself. What do I love to do, that I can do alone or in my own time/space? How can I create a time for just thoughts, my emotions, and me? As I began to look at those questions and start the process of answering them I found a fairly simple solution to my struggles with the follow through on the many self-care practices I have been taught and read about over the last few years. The one thing I had to do that I wasn’t doing was I needed to schedule it. I needed to write it in my calendar, set a reminder, and have my phone buzz at me non-stop until I did it. So every Monday, Wednesday and Friday my phone...

As I drink my morning coffee and look out my window from my room I notice the white snow that lies so peacefully on the grass. I see cars drive by as people hurry on with their crazy lives never noticing the simplicity of the world around them. Over these last few months I have spent time journeying through many new emotions, ideas, and ways of life unsure of how I all fit together. One of the things that I have started to do in my daily life is to take 5 minutes a day, just 5 minutes to sit in silence and observe the world around me. In those five minutes I often sit on my bed which looks out a window onto part of my college campus. I just sit and watch to take in everything. Sometimes I sit with peaceful music other times just with pure silence. Through these reflective 5 minutes each day I find myself re-energized and restored to continue with my day. These 5 minutes have started to transfer into my every moment. I notice the simple things much more quickly and have slowed down my...

I don’t know what sparked me to think of this today but for some reason my mind went straight to this blog and the fact that I haven’t been blogging at all. I started this blog way back in the beginning of my time in high school. For many years I used it as a coping mechanism to deal with the crazy changes that were occurring in my life at the time. It became a sanctuary and place for me to write about Alpha-1, the newness of it, the fears and the anxieties that come with the unknown. So today I reflected on why I haven’t been writing, what stopped me, and why hasn't it even crossed my mind to blog in months. Well here are some of the answers I came up with in my time of reflection.             Why haven’t I written… well the simple answer would be I’m a college student and carry a crazy course load each semester but when I was honest with myself this was not the true reason of why I haven’t been writing, I easily could have fit...

Well the last time I wrote was November…. I have definitely been slacking on updating all of you!!! College life has gotten in the way of my updating and has taken up most of my time. This semester has been especially full of classes, work, projects, and of course getting into the classroom and teaching the amazing kids that often teach me more then I feel I am teaching them. They never fail at amazing me in their energy, love, passion for learning, and of course the many crazy things that they say. This semester I am surrounded by 19 wonderful 1 st graders who brighten my day every time I see them! When I am not in the classroom either as a student or a teacher I am normally doing work to be a student or the teacher. It is a never ending flurry of things to do, but I wouldn't change it for the world. So many wonderful and positive things have happened since November that it is hard to pick a place to start but I think the best place to start would be the wonderful trip my fam...

As many of you know I started writing this blog to share the journey my family is on dealing with Alpha-1  Antitrypsin Deficiency. Alpha-1 is a genetic condition that is passed on by parents to their children through their genes and can cause serious liver disease in children and liver and/or lung disease in adults. Alpha-1 antitrypsin is a protein that is produced mostly in the liver. Its primary function is to protect the lungs from neutrophil elastase. Neutrophil elastase is an enzyme that normally serves a useful purpose in lung tissue-it digests damaged or aging cells and bacteria to promote healing. However, if left unchecked, it will also attack healthy lung tissue. Alpha-1 antitrypsin, in sufficient amounts, will trap and destroy neutrophil elastase before it has a chance to begin damaging the delicate lung tissue. Consequently, if an individual doesn't have enough alpha-1 antitrypsin, the enzyme goes unchecked and attacks the lung.  My Dad was diagnosed in 2008 and...

             It’s fall in the Valley and I have been back at school for almost 6 weeks already! I have once again failed at updating you in a timely manner; I never seem to get better at this. Since returning to school things have been crazy, lots of classes, homework, and activities. My first week on campus was spent between band camp and peer mentor training for orientation weekend. It was a crazy week of going from one thing to the next but it was a lot of fun. It was time to spend with friends I had been missing all summer and work on this year’s marching show which is “LVC after Dark”. The show is great fun and also has some surprises included. While I wasn't marching I was preparing for orientation weekend through games, presentations, and many exciting activities. Once classes started everything went into my classes and the work sitting before me. This semester will be a challenge and juggling act between classes, music ensembles, and a social...

             51 days ago I posted about my first year in college. I talked about the amazing experiences and people that I met in the first fourth of my college experience. When I wrote that post I was focused on how it was such a sad moment that my first year was over and about how much I couldn't wait to return to my new home, Lebanon Valley College. In 47 days I do what 51 days ago I couldn't and still can't wait to do, return to a place I love. A place I get to experience things beyond what I ever thought I would or could experinace and spend time with people that lift me up and help me to be a better person. 51 days into my time away from LVC I have started to realize how much I have changed in my first year there. Everything about me has changed, yes I am still the same Amanda but there  is a difference in my perspective, thoughts, and actions. As most of you know who read my blog my high school years weren't exactly picture perfect or as I...